Good morning,
Yesterday I spoke of memory. Today, I thought I’d share a couple of memories, one of which I was reminded and the second of which is one of my favorite stories about Andrea’s and my first date:
MEMORIES OF THE CHURCHILL TEST
Just as memories of the day-to-day often fall away over time, sometimes just remembering oneself from an earlier time can be problematic. What I have found is that the best repository of information about the “old me” from prior lives—college, as a young lawyer, when the kids were growing up—are friends from along the journey. I also find myself recounting stories from a friend’s life that the friend has forgotten.
Recently, my brother-in-law, Andrew Kopkin (Gale’s husband) recalled a story of my early dating days that I had forgotten. For my 20s and early 30s, I dated with no interest in marriage. This changed when I started getting more serious about dating. I announced to friends that I would willingly go out on a blind date with anyone who, at least “on paper,” was a decent match. That said, I had various tests and rules to differentiate whether a girl was just fun to be with or whether they had the substance that would justify a more serious relationship. One of these rules was never to date a woman with more than one cat. Another was not to go out again with someone who could not say something about one of the books on her bookshelf. What I learned after inquiring about books in women’s living rooms is that apparently there is not an insignificant number of folks who use books as a design accessory, rather than as compilations of written words that they had consumed. There were other silly rules.
One of the best measures I employed, though, had to be the one Andrew reminded me about. It had to do with setting a baseline for a woman’s knowledge/awareness/appreciation of history.
The measure was the “Churchill Test.” It went something like this:
1. Take the woman to the Queen Mary or some other location where there are portraits of famous Brits on the wall.
2. Walk up to the portrait of Winston Churchill. Pause and say something like, “there he is, arguably the greatest man of the twentieth century, the man who saved democracy from fascism.”
3. Wait for a response.
4. If the woman answers “who is that?” or can’t say anything thoughtful about Churchill, it’s time to move on to date someone else.
ANDREA’S DATING RULES
I was not the only one with rules and tests from blind dating days. Andrea’s rules were pretty straightforward:
1. Never waste a weekend evening
2. Only drinks; don’t agree to dinner
3. Take your own car; never get in the guy’s car
When Howard and Sue Kroll introduced us, we both had pretty high hopes. I called Andrea and we immediately hit it off on the phone. We settled on a Thursday night. Since the weekend begins on Thursday night (I learned this as an undergrad at USC—as a USC alumna, she knew of this categorization as well…), I figure she broke the first rule almost immediately. Then I suggested dinner. She resisted dinner and suggested only drinks, but I was having no part of that. I pointed out that “food is our friend.” I was all-in. She eventually relented, after a sufficient amount of cajoling.
I knew this was an important date, so I booked one of the hot trendy restaurants (Chaya Brasserie, for those who are curious). Things went well. Over dessert, I had the temerity to inquire of Andrea if she enjoyed bowling. She said yes, no doubt to prove she was a good sport. I said, “Great. It’s our firm’s bowling night. Let’s go.” And so we were off, violating her third rule—not to get in the guy’s car.
I was such a clueless knucklehead that I didn’t appreciate that a young woman in a miniskirt and high heels probably wasn’t appropriately equipped for bowling. I, on the other hand, changed into my bowling shirt in the parking lot and off we were... It was love at first sight.
Andrew, thanks for the reminder of the Churchill Test. Andrea, thank for agreeing to a second date with a guy in a bowling shirt with the nickname “Slick” embroidered over the pocket. What were you thinking?
Have a great day,
Glenn
Very funny and very cute!